What is Flavor Flav’s essence?

Do you know what time it is? This is one of Flavor Flav’s signature lines along with other classics like, Yeaaaaaaa Boyeee and WOW (dragged out and exaggerated.) Flav with his ridiculous clocks, capes, crowns, sunglasses and dreads appears to think he is some sort of style icon. When really he looks like a cockroach in human form. Tell me you think that man is attractive? Come on. . .



Flav is famous for wearing ridiculously big clocks around his neck and being a rap pioneer in the late 80s and early 90s in Public Enemy. How does he get the masses to tune in to VH1? His show was the highest rating VH1 has ever had. He gets trashy girls to scream FLAVOR FLAV. This man should be kissing VH1’s ass and them vice versa. In the midst of all the reality television craze he has participated in three hit shows for VH1. He was on Surreal Life where he got hot with Brigitte Nielson and then that spawned the disgustingly, weird Strange Love. Then when Brigitte smartened up deciding this will never work and she was over her 15 minutes of fame again in the spotlight she left poor Flav alone and rejected. Thus, the birth of Flavor of Love. Now, with two seasons under his belt and still no love, he is about to dive into his third season.


I have to admit I watch the show because the girls are out-of-control ridiculous. They make the show. The premise is nuts. Girls line up to prove they love Flav and would be the best match for him. They are hilarious from how they talk, how they dress, how they are immediately in love and infatuated with Flav. Does he drug these women or does he wear a special pheromone that attracts skanks to him? They are literally moths to a flame when he enters the room. Is this really how one finds love? I have watched the show to tune into the bizarre antics. I love the fake orgasms and all the sex that goes on behind not so closed doors. The girls basically line up in lingerie begging for the chance. Personally, I would rather go through Chinese water torture than sleep with Flav. But these girls are all about it. These girls are all different types of trash ranging from white trash to ghetto fabulous to video ho.

Season 1 Girls:

Season 2 Girls:



I was trying to think of why any sane woman would go on the show. And then I remembered most women are not sane and there are a whole slew of women who are by no means considered classy or civilized really. There really is a plethora of reasons to show up and audition.

Trashy, skank bitches go on the show to:

1. to perform oral on national television
2. to get into fights
3. to be reduced to a sex object for Flav to have his way with
4. to show off trashy princess tattoo on your chest
5. to dress like complete hoe-skis
6. to get a humiliating nickname based off your physical looks/personality
7. to promote their new album
8. to be a gold-digger
9. to spit on New York
10. to get wasted
11. to get your own show
12. to reveal your sob story and how oppressed you are
13. to poop on the floor
14. to be reality show hos and then go on Charm School with Mo’nique
15. to stay off welfare
16. to pose in men’s magazines
17. to booty dance
18. to get a free meal
19. to make friends
20. to get their 15 minutes of fame

This clip is possibly the major reason this show was such a hit.
All stemming from a very interesting altercation between Pumkin and New York.




These shows have given way to so many other spin off shows. First, there was I Love New York. The main bitch in the house, who thinks she is god’s gift, has an insane mother and is absolutely ignorant. I love how she misuses words. Clearly, she was there for entertainment value and Flav is still sane enough to realize there was no way in hell he could end up with this bitch. New York got her own show, to find love for herself. This is an equally ridiculous show where New York and her scary drag queen mom try to find the right man for her. Then, there was Charm School where everyone took notice at the trashy behavior of all these adult women and went through etiquette school. Now, VH1 has Rock of Love with Bret Michaels. I guess VH1 will continue to ride this wave out as long as it keeps making the big dollars. There mentality has to be ‘if it aint broke, don’t fix it.’

I fear that this man may never find love on the pure fact that he is one of the most unattractive men who is a complete womanizer. How can you fall in love on television? It is too fake and every season a girl ends up ‘winning’ and never stays with him! Don’t you find that a little odd? Perhaps he should try a new avenue for scoring women. Maybe, he can’t without the camera. Oh well, I guiltly will watch the show and enjoy the craziness of the women, Flav and New York.

I love it. Absolutely, I will tune in and will continue to tune in until Flav and New York find love. If that ever happens . . .

I feel like there are more specific examples to dissect and discuss but please feel free to share your favorite Flav moments. Basically, I think Flav’s essence relies on watching the bowels of society interact. It’s like watching something happen at the zoo. You’re interested enough to watch but are glad your safely behind the glass or cage.

This show has, whether you like it or not, had serious impact in recent pop culture and will continue to as long as he is on the air.