4 Female College Students Sitting Around Shooting the Shit, Griping about their Days
ME (Stressed Advertising major, relaxing with a drink and cigarette): How was your day today?
Roommate 1 (History major, finished her European sequence, now in upper-level grad history classes, she enters, giddy with excitement): FABULOUS
ME: Why was the day so great?
Roommate 1: I am in love with my professor! He is BRILLIANT and we had a big lecture today about slavery.
Roommate 2 (Art History major, enters)
Roommate 1: Well, I left class to use the restroom and my professor told the class he though I was a Marxist. Then, I walked and talked with him on my way to Starbucks and he poked fun at my views.
Roommate 2: What’s Marxism?
ME (shocked and bewildered): You don’t know what Marxism is?
Roommate 1 (baffled and frightened): You know, Karl Marx?!
Roommate 2: Who is he?
Roommate 1: Karl Marx, he’s a communist! He was the father of communism. . .
Roommate 2: Never heard of him, what’s communism?
ME: How did you pass high school history?
Roommate 2: He’s old right?
Roommate 1: Yes he’s been dead for quite some time. Economics is a driving force in class social structure, wrote the Communist Manifesto . . .
Roommate 2 (losing interest in discussion): Was he popular?
ME and Roommate 1 (exchanging bewildered glances)
Roommate 2: Wait, is Marx spelled M-A-R-X
Roommate 1: Yes
Roommate 2: Is Karl spelled with a K?
ME: YES!
Roommate 2: Oh, I think we were actually talking about him in class today. Anyways . . .
ME and Roommate 1 (trying to salvage the awkward silence because we know our friend is not dumb)
Roommate 1 (offers): Well, I was in class and I volunteered the definition of Socialism and my professor looked at me like I was retarded and stammered, “Not Exactly . . .” I’m a history major. It was really embarrassing.
ME: Well, I thought there were 500 million people in the United States and not so much, there are apparently 300 million people, people laughed, I brushed it off, no big deal.
Roommate 3 (Psychology major, enters): What are you guys talking about?
ME: About how dumb we can be?
Roommate 3: Oh cool.
ME: We have all had our moments. Remember our World Perspectives class. . .
Roommate 3: O god, it was a rough sketch, it was an accident!
Roommate 2: What happened?
ME: Well, we were sitting in World Perspectives and she was trying to be cutesy and was drawing the globe in place of the word world and the word perspectives at the top of her paper to take notes. She was sketching the continents and I am watching her instead of listening to the professor and I look over and see if her sketch is done. I whisper what’s that. She said, “What’s what?” What is that hanging off North America on the California side?” Her, “What?” Me, “That.” And I point. “That’s South America!” What!!!
Roommates 1 and 2 (laughing)
Roommate 3 (not so much) It was a common mistake.
SO the conversation turns back into mindless chatter and we stay away from our common sense shortcomings BUT you can see where the problem is. . . I want to know how we all made it this far along in the game without knowing obvious pieces of information. I don’t know where the blame should lie, but it should be reaffirmed that we are not dumb girls. On paper we look great, Honor Roll, Deans List, good SAT scores . . . yet one of us can’t locate South America on globe, another doesn’t know a working definition for socialism, the next has no clue who Marx is and I have no idea how many people are in the United States (but knew there were over 6 billion people on the planet). What’s wrong with this picture?
PS: In case you didn't know some of these things, allow me to educate you, I have provided pictures and links to clarify
This is Karl Marx. . .
This is the map of the world (note where South America is located)
http://www.slp.org/what_is.htm (Answer to Socialism)
http://www.nationmaster.com/country/us-united-states (Answer to U.S. population)
13 comments:
speaking of dumbasses, i kind of didnt get this post. it was long and involved...too much reading (&c).
and i know where to place the blame -- the education system in this CUNTry is subpar. they are too busy teaching about feelings and pointless shit that doesnt matter (see: Math).
oh yeah, i DID enjoy the title of this post. very much so.
bet you thought you were getting 2 comments, but it was really just me. twice. thrice now. HAH!
I totally know what your talking about! For example, I'm at work right now and one of the guys I work with poured coffee on his arm and put his hand down on a thumb tack. However he is one of the most intellegent people that I know. Shit happens. How can someone that pours coffee on his arm and put his hand on a thumb tack all in he same 10 minutes still be alive? Luck. We are all just lucky bitches!
This is a job for Paul.
EMT. Dean's List Student.
Can't make Ramen Noodles on a stove.
Sometimes the common sense thing is just to hard.
Nolan just put his hand directly on a tac...
its okay, everyone has their moments, I got all through high school with Deans list/ honor roll but i cant spell to save my life.
I also didnt know nigra falls was connected to New York and Canada
I think you should have your next entry be about me and my wise fucking advice I give you that may or may not involve jazz music. I mean seriously, if I'm not considered influential by this point, I think I may have to do something drastic.
I think everyone has a little dumbass in them, it's what lets people take the piss out of themselves. My friend Special has bags and bags of the dumbass gene, hence her nickname!
Ok...so that was funny. It will be really good to have for the children of America and the support of Africa and Iraq, so ...such as...our schools and support our children in Africa, and places like Iraq, you know...such as.
Well, you can be thankful that it wasn't as bad as it could have been.
And it wasn't on National TV...or Youtube.
Visit pulsecomm.blogspot.com
south america is sort of close to californa.. : ) come on now.
all i have to say is i've written a 5 page paper on Karl Marx, taken a test on him ( both at USF ) and successfully, to this day, couldn't tell you more than he's the father of communism.
speaking from similar experiences, I think you should not be so harsh on your friends, who clearly seem to be fabulously brilliant, yet strained by the enormous course load their sexy yet demanding professors are placing on them. If I may make a suggestion ... when coming home from campus after a long day, instead of turning on the hills to hear about L.C.'s current man drama, how about turning on CNN. Just one hour a day will undoubtedly keep you up to date. and plus side is if you happen to catch 360 with Anderson Cooper you get the added hottie bonus.
anderson cooper is gay, mindy.. uh-duh.
yes everyone has their moments, but its just the way the world works. you should look up and see if u can find how many other people don't know the def. for socialism, who karl marx is, where south america is, and how many people live in the united states. u would be surprised by the numbers. and if the numbers are super low well then if fact u all are dumb shits. no just kidding, but instead of blaming ourselves, we should blame society for shaping itself into something so materialistic that you can't see straight. our school system is messed up, but what are we going to do aboout it now. plus we can't really blame our school system because there is such a BROAD range of things to learn - who is to say this is important and thats not important to learn. p.s. who gives a fuck who karl marx is - he is dead, no average person knows the word for word definition of socialism, people are born and die everyday - so who knows the real number of america's population, and i don't have a good excuse for south america :) but im sure she is brilliant
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